A blonde woman walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. She says she’s going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys
A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martinus. “You mean a martini?” the bartender asks. The Roman replies, “If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!” View Reddit by RyanJWells – View Source Please follow and like us:
and lines up at the first available teller. Just at that moment the bank gets robbed and she is shot three times in the stomach. She was rushed to the hospital where she was fixed up. As she leaves she asks the doctor about her baby. The doctor says, “Oh! You’re going to have triplets.
He sees a Jew sitting in the corner and says “A drink for everyone except the Jew!” But the Jew still smiles. Now annoyed, the Nazi says “Another round for everyone except the Jew!” But the Jew is still smiling. Confused and enraged, the Nazi asks the bartender “What, is he an idiot?” The bartender
…and orders a steak. The guy behind the counter tells him it’ll be $1. “One dollar?! I’ve been coming to this bar every week for who knows how long, and it’s always been $12! Where’s Phil the owner?” “He’s upstairs with my wife.” “Well, what’s he doing with your wife?” “The same thing I’m doing
The man asks the bartender “Whats the deal with the horse and the money?” Bartender goes “That’s the angriest horse in the world, anyone who can get him to ease up gets the bucket of cash. $20 bucks though if ya lose.” The man walks over to the horse and whispers something in its ear
In one, he has a few drinks, becomes the life of the party, gets lucky and has a splendid time. In the other he drinks too much, picks a fight with the wrong company and ends up beaten to half of his life. The next day, he happens to meet an old buddy. After some
He tells the attendant that he is chasing something a little different, “everyone has dogs and cats and birds and fish, I want something different” The attendant says “I’ve got just the thing, here, we have a talking centipede” “Perfect says the man, that sounds great ill take one of those” He gets the centipede