On arrival in heaven, the Holocaust survivor tells God a Holocaust joke. God says, “that’s not funny.” The survivor replies, “ah, well, you had to be there.” View Reddit by ivanthecurious – View Source Please follow and like us:
While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. ‘Welcome to heaven,’ says St. Peter. ‘Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around
A terrible bus crash kills 4 Nuns. They arrive at the Pearly Gates and are greeted by St Peter. St Peter says: “Before you enter Heaven, you must be cleansed of sin”. The first Nun, Sister Josephine, raises her hand and says “I have seen with my own eyes a naked penis”. St Peter replies:
So St. Peter was instructed by God to only let in people, who, apart from having lived honorable lives, had also suffered a terribly traumatic last moment, and needed consolation for that. The next day, St. Peter went to his place at the front gates of Heaven, and three men were there, waiting for him.
A man died and went to The Judgment, they told him , “Before you meet with God, I should tell you — we’ve looked over your life, and to be honest you really didn’t do anything particularly good or bad. We’re not really sure what to do with you. Can you tell us anything you
Next in line is a preacher. St. Peter looks him up in his Big Book, furrows his brow and says, “OK, we’ll let you in, but take that cloth robe and wooden staff.” The preacher is shocked and replies, “But I am a man of the cloth. You gave that cab driver a gold staff
However, they have all sinned in their lives, so they are kept at the base of the 100 step stairway-to-heaven. God comes to them and says “All of you have commited sins that cannot be forgiven, so you must face a trial if you wish to enter heaven. Every step you take on this stairway,