The pilot, Captain Heelspurs, runs into trouble and realizes they’re going to crash. He races to the cabin, grabs a parachute, and bails, hollering, “There are three parachutes left. You guys are on your own.” Angela Merkel says, “Since I’m the leader of the free world now, I need to survive.” She takes a parachute
Two Newfies were flying a plane and were getting ready to land. The pilot says to the co-pilot “Alright let’s get ready to land! Follow procedure and adjust the tail flaps!” The plane continues on it’s path towards the runway. The pilot notices that the runway looks a little short and says to the co-pilot
Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, “Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However, the odds are
Brad Pitt, grabbing a parachute, says: “I’m sorry, guys. My kids need me, my fans need me, I’m outta here.” He jumps. Donald Trump says: “I’m sorry, too, but I’m going to be the smartest president to ever govern the United States.” He jumps. Finally, the old man says to the boy: “You know what?
The pilot speaks on the intercom, “Engine one has failed, engine two is on its way out. Grab a parachute I wish you the best.” On board was a Catholic priest, a Rabbi, a lawyer and three boy scouts. As they searched for life vest and parachutes they only found three. The Adults huddled to