Tag: bar

A man walks into a bar…

…he approaches the barman and asks for a whiskey and coke. “Take this apple.” “I don’t want an apple. I want a JD and coke.” “Trust me, try the apple.” The man takes a bite, and exclaims “Christ! This tastes like Jack Daniels!” “Yup. Turn it around.” “Wow!” He says after taking a bite from

I met an older woman at a bar last night…

She wasn’t bad for 48; we drank and bullshitted a bit, then she asked if I’d ever had the ‘sportsman’s double’, a mother and daughter threesome? I said no. We drank a bit more, then she says that tonight was my lucky night. I went back to her place. She put the hall light on

A biker walks into a bar…

…and sits down on a bar stool near the end of the bar. He takes a look at the menu and it reads as follows: Hamburger – 2.99 Cheeseburger – 3.99 Chicken Sandwich – 4.99 Hand Jobs – 19.99 The crusty old biker waves the bartender down, and up walks this tall, busty, beautiful redhead

Another guy walks into a bar joke

A guy walks into a bar wearing a Browns jersey and carrying a cat that also has a Browns jersey on with a little Browns helmet on his head, too. The guy says to the bartender, “Can my cat and I watch the Browns game here? My TV at home is broke, and my cat

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar

They are about to sit down when the bartender says: “It costs $60 to sit on the chair.” The priest and the rabbi say “That’s absurd! What’s the reason for this charge?” The bartender says “Well the goal is to provide patrons with a sense of pride and accompli—“ The priest and the rabbi throw

A man sees a woman in a bar…

A man sees a woman in a bar and asks, “Ma’am, would you sleep with me for a million dollars?” The woman is startled at first, but replies, “My goodness! Well, I suppose… we would have to discuss terms, of course…” The man turns away from her and says, “I’ve changed my mind. Would you