A young guy from North Dakota moves to Florida

He goes to a big “everything under one roof” department store looking for a job.

The Manager says, “Do you have any sales experience?”

The kid says “Yeah. I was a vacuum salesman back in North Dakota .”

Well, the boss was unsure, but he liked the kid and figured he’d give him a shot, so he gave him the job. “You start tomorrow. I’ll come down after we close and see how you did.”

His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down to the sales floor. “How many customers bought something from you today?”

The kid frowns and looks at the floor and mutters, “One”.

The boss says “Just one?!!? Our sales people average sales to 20 to 30 customers a day. That will have to change, and soon, if you’d like to continue your employment here. We have very strict standards for our sales force here in Florida . One sale a day might have been acceptable in North Dakota , but you’re not on the farm anymore, son.”

The kid took his beating, but continued to look at his shoes, so the boss felt kinda bad for chewing him out on his first day. He asked (semi-sarcastically), “So, how much was your one sale for?”

The kid looks up at his boss and says “$101,237.65″.

The boss, astonished, says $101,237.65?!? What the heck did you sell?”

The kid says, “Well, first, I sold him some new fish hooks. Then I sold him a new fishing rod to go with his new hooks. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him a twin engine Chris Craft. Then he said he didn’t think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that 4×4 Expedition.”

The boss said “A guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat and a TRUCK!?”

The kid said “No, the guy came in here to buy tampons for his wife, and I said, ‘Dude, your weekend’s shot, you should go fishing.’

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  1. I was trying to talk to my girlfriend on a pair of walkie talkies the other day, but she just kept making static noises.

    I think we’re breaking up

  2. Real story: a guy walked into my garment store, seemed loaded. I decided to handle him personally. He asked for a deo. I showed him to our deo counter. Started a chat. Sold him a pack of underwear, then a T-shirt, then 2 shirts, 2 denims, a blazer, 2 pair of snickers.

    Best part, he came back in the evening with few of his friends, told them, this guy knows his stuff. Ask him to find you good clothes. My total sales that day matched a weeks sales.
    That was a fun day 🙂

  3. North Dakota Man
    The Dakota Deceptor


    -Persuades the target to buy a boat and a truck
    -Stuns the store manager for 5 seconds

    -Causes all employers on the field to be stunned by his sales ability for 10 seconds
    -Adds the confusion effect on the nearest employer for 1 minute.

    Drops: Fishing hook, Fishing Rod, Boat and a Truck

  4. Chris Craft? Sleazy salesmen those boats are garbage. Shit hull, shit build quality, mediocre company.

    Also how big a boat we talking here? Cause a civic can tow 1500lbs, and you can easily get a 14 Fiberglass hull under 800.

    I’m fun at parties.

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